Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Project on way...

I'm beginning a project that's been an idea now for about 5 years or more, but I'm so ready to start it even though there is much going on in my life at the moment. I'm extremely excited about it and hope you'll come back in a few months to check it out!! It has to do with Cheerleading and that's the only clue you'll get for now. Hope to see you back here after the New Year!!!

"Happy Holidays!"

Chow-4-now, Cheerbear ;)

Saturday, September 6, 2008

70's Child

Monday, June 9, 2008

A poem written by our son...untitled (vulgar language)




Our oldest (17 years) son, Kyle, has recently lost his (first) love of the last three-year (on and off again) relationship and has dealt with issues of abandonment/depression from my parents when he was just seven as well. Also, he has had to endure verbal/mental abuse from his alcoholic father all-the-while growing up. I did separate from my husband back in '98 for nearly a year because of the abuse, but due to his effort to get help I reconciled. However, he slipped back into routine less than a year later and because of other unhealthy circumstances (poor health/medical issues/death of grandparents) caused me to stay in the relationship - and I have been dedicated since. Not to say, their father is not a loving dad - I will say he will go over and beyond to make sure that the kids are taken care of financially. When he's not under the influence he's an extremely loving and thoughtful person with a kind heart - I truly mean this, but because of what he endured as a child and beyond has left him paralyzed with fear and guilt; he then feeds his pain with what he's conditioned himself with for many many years and the alcohol consumes him entirely and therefore leads us to Kyles pain.

This is what Kyle wrote to his father only a few days ago...
(His dad is extremely poetic and has also used this type of genre to release his feelings)


The love in this family is so f*cked up,
If you feel pain, you gotta get it sucked up.
You said I haven't loved you for about 5 years,
Well how the f*ck can I, you only care for your beers.

You stayed sober for awhile before,
Too bad it was only until you opened the shop door.
You drink every night to cover your own depression,
While I try to come up with ways to show my affection.

I do what I'm told,
You never need to scold.
Ya I f*ck up,
But that sh*t's so old.

I drink casually to relax with my friends,
You drink by yourself and it never ever ends.
When you drink like that, you're a whole different person,
You try to bring everyone down to your f*cked up version.

I know I sneak out,
But I aint done nothing wrong.
So what if me and my friends rip a couple hits off the bong?

You need to just let me go,
That's something hard for you, I know.
"You're the kid I'm the adult" is what you love to say,
Go ahead and think like that while you drink by yourself all day.

If you want to push me away,
Keep doin what you're doin.
Of course it bothers me,
But I know what I'm persuin.

Of course I love you,
And you know I always will.
Just please stop bringin' me down,
So later in life we can chill~





P.S. This poem comes so close to Father's Day and hits right at the core- please pray that Kyle and his father will begin to mend what has been broken so that their relationship becomes a loving and cherised one. Also, please keep us all in prayer...our family is all going through some terrible pain and medical issues (especially Kyle, Keith and his father). For Kyle, Keith and dad - to be able to find comfort and peace and to know that all things shall pass. To have the desire and will to look at other means of help and support other than the destructing and negative resources that seem to consume them almost on a dialy basis.

Also, please pray that the other family members will continue to be strong and supportive.




Thank you much and God Bless~

Friday, April 11, 2008

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Check out my new website...

www.cheerbear.webs.com/

Make sure to leave your comments or any suggestions that you think might be helpful.
Thanks so much for stopping by, YOU ROCK!

Muah~

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

A Closing Note (Epiphany...in regards to Inner Celebration from Lynn Gericho)

Epiphany - January 6

"A Closing Note The Holy Nights of Inner Christmas have passed. Our souls now reenter ordinary time. Today is Epiphany in the Christian calendar and celebrates two events in the life of Jesus. First, is the arrival of the Three Wise Men with their gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh at the manger in Bethlehem. Second, occurring thirty years later is the Baptism of Jesus in the River Jordan and the beginning the Christ Deed on Earth. In the Soul’s Calendar, January 6 is the day of new inner awakening. Your soul has been in a mystical sleep for the Twelve Holy Nights and it now awakes with the dawning of new wisdom. This new wisdom brings you three precious gifts – new clarity in your thought life, new harmony in your feeling life, and new strength in your will life. Your soul returns to ordinary time - renewed, reborn, and ready to participate in the New Year..."

This was a post from a gal who felt extremely moved by the "Twelve Holy Nights" by Lynn Gericho (as we all did that read her blogh)and wrote the following:

My Epiphany~
A Cherokee Lesson: Two wolves
An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. "A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy. "It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.

"One is evil -- he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

"The other is good -- he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

"This same fight is going on inside you -- and inside every other person, too."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather,

"Which wolf will win?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."


If there is someone in your heart and mind who needs
healing or help of any kind, think of this dear one
now as you meditate on the following ideas:

· I surround you with thoughts of love.
· I see you strong, because God is your strength.
· I see you whole, because God is the life of your body.
· I see you unafraid, because God fills you with faith
and courage.
· I see you free from doubt and discouragement, serene and
steady, because the light of Spirit glows within you.
· I see you invincible, unconquerable, because you are first,

a
spiritual being, a child of the Most High.
· I see you as God sees you.
· I know that the healing power of God is mightily active in
you.
· Every time I think of you, I give thanks that God’s perfect
work is being done in you, for you, and through you, as you.

Make It a Great 2008!
Your Friend,Dee


The following is my own response to "The Closing Note":


posted by: Dee on Sun, 1/6 07:44 AM EST
I too have copied all twelve nights and will revisit on occasion due to the spiritual cleansing I received through reading each polarity. There is an extreme richness to life when we engage our minds to expanding our thoughts to all that surround us and to Lynn and the others, I thank you for this. I appreciate reading your thoughts and philosophies to living life. Take care and God Bless.

Hugs~
posted by: Christine on Sun, 1/6 10:30 AM EST

Twelfth Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

A Personal Practice of Reflection and Renewal
for Individuals of All Faiths and Traditions
During the Twelve Holy Nights of the Year
December 25 til January 6

The Twelfth Holy Night - January 5

Certainty and Doubt
"Here we are at the last of the Twelve Holy Nights. Tomorrow I will send a message about Epiphany, but for now we must look to another polarity.
I have chosen Certainty and Doubt as the closing couple. How do we marry Certainty and Doubt in our souls? For me these two are hopelessly and wonderfully intertwined in my soul.
Certainty comforts me. It tells me I am experiencing what is true. True for me in the moment.
Moment is my favorite measure of time. A moment can be indefinably brief or it can take forever depending on the thought, feeling or action that occupies it.
So Certainty is a feeling found in moments filled with truth, confidence and elegance.
Yet, I am wary of lasting Certainty and it’s comfort. Lasting Certainty seductively asks me to fly high like Icarus, forgetting that my wings are held together with wax and that the sun is hot. Let Certainty be momentary … and tempered by wisdom.
Wisdom in her wariness will ask questions of Certainty: How close can I fly to the sun before melting? Do I need a parachute? She knows the dangers of lasting Certainty. Answer her questions.
Doubt challenges me. It tells me that my reality, spiritual or earthly, is complex and fluid. Doubt gives me choices: I can float or drown. Yes, Doubt is watery..."



I am very certain that without these enlightening polarities of inner celebration my reflections of life would no doubt be different and I would not have reflected in the spiritual ways that they lead me. Lynn, I thank you and all who shared during this time of blessing - what a warm and pleasant way to begin the New Year.

May we all be blessed with a new outlook to life!

Hugs~
posted by: Christine on Sat, 1/5 11:44 AM EST

Eleventh Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

A Personal Practice of Reflection and Renewal
for Individuals of All Faiths and Traditions
During the Twelve Holy Nights of the Year
December 25 til January 6

The Eleventh Holy Night - January 4

Passion and Compassion
"Passion and Compassion is tonight’s polarity. They are another polarity that relates to the heart.
I want a heart that is both passionate and compassionate. Passion and compassion have to do with joy and suffering in earthly and spiritual realms. To feel one and not the other would lead to a very lopsided life.
Passion arises in the earthly, selfish heart wanting heavenly joy through earthly experience. It is the feeling of intense enthusiasm, demanding hunger, or painful longing.
Passion fills our souls with self-interest and drives us to self-fulfillment and self-satisfaction.
Passion’s selfishness is necessary. It is a joyful expression of individuality. Sadly, passion can become inflamed, obsessive and never be satisfied. Uncontrolled passion brings suffering to the soul. Passion lives in a balanced metamorphosis between the force of arousal and the release through satisfaction. Passion can flame out in unrelieved arousal or die stillborn in apathy.

We need to find our passions and to know them well. We can share the ideas that are shaped by our passions and we can engage others in the deeds that fulfill our passions.
However, as an emotional feeling, our passions are a solitary experience. We feel only with ourselves..."




My response:


For me, this night of inner celebration couldn't of come at a more divine time...my grandma has been in ICU for the last several days due to complications of a failing heart. She is 89 years young, full of life and love. I invite you to share in the passion between a granddaughter and her admiration for her extraordinary grandmother in hopes that your compassion for life and love within your own relationships be restored.

Who Is This Woman I Dearly Love?

Coming to America, that was their plan,
A new life together, leaving their past in Finland.

They came with ideas, big dreams and goals,
To settle down in Minnesota, why—who knows?

She was born to a gentleman, strong, quiet and handy,
But because of the Depression, times were tough—money scanty.

Her mother was pretty and adjusted just fine,
To having six kids, always giving of her time.

With father at work five days a week then weekends gone fishin’,
Mother was at home cleaning up and preparing meals in the kitchen.

Being born last, she was the second girl to four boys,
Although all were loved, she was the baby—their pride and joy.

When asked what her childhood home was like,
She answered, “Grey in color, big yard with a well-pump and fence on all sides.”

It saddened my heart to hear of their deaths,
First her sister so young, then a brother four years later, age twenty—God bless~

Her parents and family moved on best they could,
They leaned on each other like loving families should.

Not too long after violence broke out causing WWII,
Her mother very sick from the influenza flu.

Father died of old age not too soon after,
Then did go Mama, possibly of “broken-heart” failure.

The rest of the kids stayed in touch with one another,
Some went alone and some went on together.

Some headed out west, others went to the east,
But she’s the only one living now, the others deceased.

There are many still left who branched off from her clan,
Don’t forget those families back in Finland.

Uncles, aunts, cousins abroad,
But the only one I know is her only child—seems odd.

With her immediate family now gone he makes time to call,
I too, come to see her; she’s part of me after all.

Without her stories and unconditional love,
I would have missed out on knowing her family—those now above.

She and I are “alike in so many ways”,
She tells me this often on our special days.

With my joy to read and interest to write,
She an editor during high school and wrote for the city of Duluth at night.

Her parents also creative and witty,
Mother Nummelin performed in theater; Father Heino having had his own business as a tailor within the city.

That’s not all we have in common—it’s true,
Our love for nature and animals shines through.

Who is this woman I dearly love so much,
If you guessed she’s my grandma—you’ve got the riddle touch.

Her name is Leila Helmi Heino, born March 30, 1918,
Forever, with all my love—your granddaughter, Christine

posted by: Christine on Fri, 1/4 09:10 AM EST

Thursday, January 3, 2008

Tenth Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

Leading and Following

"Tonight we go ballroom dancing. The dance floor is our soul. The music is our destiny. The dance floor is filled with couples - all the polarities we have been working with."


I tend to sway back and forth with leading and following, but not yet in "tune" with my polarities to be at a graceful swing, although I'm extremely grateful to be learning about them and their differences and will make the best to expand in my thoughts to becoming a more patient and creative thinker and doer.

Thank you again Lynn and all for your diverse and thoughtful words.

Hugs~

posted by: Christine on Thu, 1/3 08:04 AM EST

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Meez 3D avatar avatars games

Ninth Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

Greetings Lynn and All~

Upon reflection from these two guiding words, "order" and "chaos" would be the two words I know "clearly". Unfortunately I was a victim to much abuse growing up...verbal, sexual, emotional, and mental, etc (you name it, I define it). However, being of optimism and hope I survived. For me, order and chaos became habit, a serenity haven if you will. It took years of soul searching, self-reflection, and growth to escape these hardened, dysfunctional areas. But as Lynn describes these two as being apart of "maintaining organization and boundaries", I can now proudly reflect the peace and balance they have in my spiritual and earthly being. However, their will always be up and downs but having had the opportunity and experiences from the past to reflect upon, I know that I will continue to see positive enlightenment.

Again, thank you abundantly Lynn for opening our souls and empowering us to think and thirst for not only our own visions, but also the connection with others as we dive into learning and loving.

Hugs~

Eigth Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

In reflection to gathering and spreading...to bring closure from 2007, I would say that overall last year was a pivotal time for me, great achievements in the area of my career and providing a better future for my family. However, I look forward to 2008 and spreading a more "intimate" and "selfless" spirit. I plan to work towards a greater patience and listening with an open heart. For when we listen, we learn.

Joel Osteen (Author of "Your Best Life Now") sums it up well..."Change your mind; expand your world - To live your best life now, you must begin looking at life through eyes of faith, visualizing the life you want to live."

Happy New Year and may you be blessed with new beginnings!!

Hugs~
posted by: Christine on Tue, 1/1 12:14 PM EST

Seventh Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

My reflection of this past year brings to mind accomplishments that I once only dreamed about, but thanks to believing in myself and staying optimistic, I prevailed! As I anticipate the future, I know without a doubt that I will indeed grow much fonder of who I am and accomplish much more of my dreams. The positive energy that comes from staying connected with those who have the same persistance and love for life has enriched my soul and for this, I am forever blessed. Thank you for being apart of this spiritual strength and God Bless~

Happy New Years to you and your families as we continue our path to our inner celebration.

Hugs~

posted by: Christine on Mon, 12/31 03:09 PM EST


Hi Christine
I love reading all your comments.... You
inspire me to stay TRUE to myself... Let's
"enjoy the journey!!! STAY OPTIMISTIC
This is my first time on a blog...
Lynn Merci Gracias Grazie Danke Thank You
Blessings
Nancy
posted by: Nancy on Mon, 12/31 04:58 PM EST

Sixth Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

I would definitely have to say my body reflects a warming spirit rather than a cooling one due to my friendly nature and need to please. Although being apart of this inner celebration I'm beginning to realize that it's beneficial for our spirit to have balance and moderation of both polarities.

Thank you again Lynn for awakening my soul and quenching my thirst to dig deeper.

Hugs~
posted by: Christine on Sun, 12/30 09:27 AM EST

Fifth Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

"To live our earthly lives we need lawfulness. To give meaning to our earthly lives we need freedom."

It's difficult for me to imagine or have an absolute perception of my desires listed like a "Things to Do List". I like to embrace each day as it comes, for me; too many tomorrows have turned bleak and unfulfilled. Not that I don’t have dreams or inspirations, because without these, life would seem dull, but living each day to the fullest gives me the power to see things in a realistic way – fulfillment and joy within the moments of the present.

Again, this is an area I will have to give more thought...an area that I will definitely explore during these Twelve Holy Nights.

I appreciate the wisdom that leads us to our inner celebration and value each and every person’s thoughts as we share allowing the freedom to be the unique and special individuals we are.

Hugs~
posted by: Christine on Sat, 12/29 11:42 AM EST

Fourth Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

"Each human being needs to find the right proportions, the beautiful horizons, of their souls and their lifetimes as they dwell in the vertical between spirit and matter."

I'm extremely thankful for Lynn Jericho and her messages within the Twelve Holy Nights. Without these reflections, my inner spirit and material perceptions would lack wholeness and purity. This is a section I will definitely explore and focus on more clearly as I move forward in my inner celebration.

Thank you again Lynn for allowing us to enrich our souls and see ourselves in an elaborate vision.

Hugs~


Inner Celebration (Lynn Gericho)

Third Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

"How do you initiate a new thought? How does movement appear in your thinking? Not through prejudice, fantasy or addiction. Through joy? Through enthusiasm? Through suffering? Through love?"

In reflection to these questions, I would have to say I act through my visions, goals, dreams, inspirations...keeping a positive outlook on life keeps me grounded with who I am. Also, my spiritual foundation is MOST IMPORTANT to me and to how I evolve as a person on a daily account.

"What rhythms in your life support the actions you take?" I'm a person who feeds off routine, and when this rhythm is interrupted it's extremely difficult to get back on beat.

"Does an inner command to “Be still” create a sense of safety or danger? What about an inner command to “Get moving”?" I'm learning to be still...I come from a background, which was on over-drive 24-7, and danger was a common ground. To learn to "be still" will definitely be a challenge.

"The Twelve Holy Nights are a time when stillness and movement in your soul marry. Can you feel that union?"

Tranquility and working towards my vision's in life are a perfect combination...here's to wishing you all a blessed Inner Christmas, together we shall be moved by spirit and one another.

Hugs~

posted by: Christine on Thu, 12/27 11:01 AM EST
Inner Celebration (Lynn Gericho)

Second Day of Inner Celebration (Continued reflection)

My thoughts of "desire" and "fulfillment" reign to question...is the desire going to fulfill an emotion, need, power, etc. and/or all the above? For me, I believe the "vision" changes/shifts for all of us at some point in our lives and what really matters is asking ourselves what "need" is it fulfilling and is it going in a positive direction? For example, is our desire to gain power and if so, will we be a better person because of this? Or, is the desire to fill an empty void in our lives...materialistic need, if so, how long will this fill our empty void and how long before we desire something else to fill our "materialistic" need. What is it that makes us feel this void...this is what we need to ask ourselves and understand about "who we are". What is it that makes us crave fulfillment and in what areas of "who we are" as a person do we feel need for the desires?? When it comes to materialistic needs, it's a no brainier..."If I lived without it yesterday, I can surely live without it today and tomorrow." However, when it comes to the emotional and self-reflecting need's, that's when the question's become bleak. I'm thrilled to be apart of the Inner Christmas Celebration...thank you all for sharing and being apart of something so divine.


Being with family and friends is what the holidays' are all about and our time together was as always, blessed with joy, love, and peace. I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas with your family and friends...here's wishing you and yours a very Happy New Year and well wishes throughout the year!

Hugs & God Bless~
posted by: Christine on Wed, 12/26 09:40 AM EST
Inner Christmas Blog (Lynn Gericho)

Inner Christmas Celebration (Self-reflection and discovery about ME!)

A Personal Practice of Reflection and Renewal
for Individuals of All Faiths and Traditions
During the Twelve Holy Nights of the Year
December 25 til January 6




Solitude and Intimacy are both one of the same to me...I enjoy being alone with my thoughts, dreams, and self-discovery. The experiences I faced while growing up has had a lot to do with "who I am today" and I feel I'm a better person because of them (the good, bad, and the ugly). I try to look at the positive side to all things and hopefully with doing so I can continue to be enriched in joy, love, and peace.

God Bless~
posted by: Christine on Tue, 12/25 06:20 AM EST
Inner Christmas Blog (Lynn Gericho)

An insightful site...find what lies within YOU!

http://www.innerchristmas.com